i was never a brilliant student from the start

so why are there so much expectations then?

expectations from lecturers, peers, parents and myself

i was the last few in the cohort each year back in sac

i spend three quarter of my time doing cca stuff instead

i assume prefects and council as a cca

two ccas.everyday i have cca

i didnt bothered much to study

last minute studying led to F9 for all my subjects except languages

somehow i made it through o levels by being hardworking

and somehow i came this far by being hardworking

and i admit at times it really gets tiring

and i just totally slack off.

thus, i'm still not a perfect A student.obviously

but just because my gpa improved

just because i'm got into DL twice

expectations started falling onto me

define not putting in enough effort for a normal student

when that particular students fails?

it used to be that case for me

but now define not putting in enough effort for me

when i dont get an A.

i'm not smart.i've repeated this phrase so many times

but still...people expect so much of me

i'm super competitive and i always want to do better

i'm forever competing with myself

i may not have put in 100% to studying

but whatever results i got

i dare say i did put in my effort and have tried my best

so stop expecting so much of me

i'm disappointed in myself and that's enough

i dont need external help in making me feel worse

M 11:12 PM